30 Halloween Facebook Status Updates

In case you hadn’t noticed ─if so, get the hell out of your coffin─ Halloween weekend is upon us. Last year’s most popular Halloween Facebook Status Update was definitely the Kanye “Imma let you finnish” West one, so what are the contenders for this year? We’re guessing these Chilean miner and Snooki statuses:

…will be a trapped Chilean miner for Halloween, unable to come out and celebrate.

…is going as Snooki this Halloween by wearing clothes 5 sizes too small, wearing Oompa Loompa orange face paint, walking around half-naked, drunk and screaming “Do you know who I am? I’m Snooki b*tch! I invented the freakin’ poof!”

Not planning on staying in for Halloween or never heard of Jersey Shore? Then here’s a bunch of other funny Halloween Facebook statuses. What will you be for Halloween?

…will be a nudist for Halloween. Costume problem solved.

…will be the grim reaper for Halloween and go trick-or-treating in the intensive care.

…will be a vampire for Halloween. And for Fangsgiving.

…will be a fisherman this Halloween. “Trick or trout!”

…will be a skeleton for Halloween and go trick-or-treating in the Body Shop.

…will be a skeleton for Halloween and dance with no body.

…will be a skeleton for Halloween and eat some spare ribs. Bone appetite!

…will be a skeleton for Halloween. Whose? Napoleon bone-apart.

…will be a vampire for Halloween. No stake sandwich for me, thank you.

…will be a ghost for Halloween and eat lots of I Scream.

…will be a ghost for Halloween and drink a lot of Boos.

…will be a ghost for Halloween and only eat boo-berries.

…will be a mummy for Halloween and listen to wrap all night.

…will be a zombie for Halloween and eat some human beans.

…will be a zombie for Halloween by wearing Decay NY.

…isn’t going to be a vampire for Halloween because it’s a pain in the neck.

…is dying to celebrate Halloween!

…has learned his/her lesson and won’t solve any riddles this year that open portals to Hell.

…agrees that for Halloween costumes, disguise the limit.

…asked him/her what he/she was going to be for Halloween. He/She said: “Single”.

…doesn’t dress up for Halloween cause he/she’s a creep all year long.

…loves Halloween because it’s the only day of the year his/her garden looks appropriately scary.

…hopes that this Halloween, he/she doesn’t end up with a bag full of restraining orders again.

And to conclude, these are the Halloween Facebook statuses that we think are most likely to get comments and likes:

…will be a nerd for Halloween. Oh, by the way, can I borrow your clothes?

…will be a 6 for Halloween. Who wants to be my 9?

…will be a mummy for Halloween. Will you be my deady?

…wants to borrow your face for Halloween.

…is going to wear a Pacman suit for Halloween and chase all Muslim women in burqas.

…is going to show off her pumpkins this Halloween.

Don’t forget to edit the he/she and him/her accordingly. Happy Halloween!